Insanity gene marker

I think there's an insanity gene marker attached to the Korean one.

About a third of our preschool, pre-k, and kindergarten students have been out sick this week. One teacher was ill Monday and Tuesday and the other two tried to call in sick today. I laughed when the first ill teacher told me and asked how that would work (since there are only 4 of us, who all teach classes every hour). He said it's not. They're coming in.

Later the director called us all into her office for a meeting. She told us the history of how up until a year ago, none of the teachers' contracts offered sick days and they would have their pay docked if they missed any days. But because she's such a benevolent dictator director, the contracts now offer (maybe) 3 sick days with pay, and so she expects us to show more enthusiasm for our work by going to the doctor before we become ill. You know, because we all included the gift of prophesy on our résumés.

Also, the parents don't appreciate that classes have to be combined when a teacher is ill and spread rumors that teachers choose not to show up for work because the dictator director doesn't pay them enough. Because what could possibly possess a teacher to take a sick day?

Henceforth, the only way our sick days will be excused is if we bring a note from the doctor whose office is next door to the school. Because if we're too ill to walk nearly a mile to school, then we should have no problem walking nearly a mile to see the doctor. And if we've already made it that far and gotten a prescription, why not just come in and infect as many students as possible so as to keep their parents happy?

Wet paint

I have nothing to say about our school not having *washable* paints for pre-k arts and crafts time except that one of my classes will never paint in my presence again. Aside from my semi-permanently stained fingers, I am amazed to say I got away paint free - a good thing, too, because I rather like this shirt. Though I do wonder a bit what Joey's mother will think of the hot pink stain 3 inches in diameter on the knee of his bright yellow school uniform. Maybe he shouldn't crawl on the fucking table covered in paint, but then again, common sense is not a part of either the school curriculum or at-home training in Korea. Which explains a whole hell of a lot.

Thank you, BA in B.S.

I had to write a paragraph introduction to be placed on the school's Web site with my picture, basically detailing how much I love teaching. I'm not into lying (thank goodness for my pr degree), so this is what I came up with:

Hello, I'm -----, born in and raised near Dallas, Texas. I graduated from the University of North Texas in 2008 with a journalism public relations degree. Teaching came as an unexpected opportunity,* and I have been doing so in Korea since November 2009. I find ---- School students are the most amazing I have met.** I expect the coming school year to hold a lot of excitement in store.***

*Read: I have no desire to teach and do not enjoy it.
**They amaze me with their raised-by-wolves behavior, disrespect, and lack of common sense.
***This is the part where I don't say how much I look forward to teaching your children...because I don't, and where I don't explicitly state whether I intend to fulfill my contract...because I don't.

What a fun writing exercise.

Write something positive

Inspired by "The Day of Silver Linings" Facebook event occurring Friday to promote positive thinking for a day, I've decided to write a post detailing the positives of today.

~The teacher who's been sick came back today, so I was no longer in charge of the horde of pre-k students for 3 classes out of 4.
~My first class went really smoothly. My students all followed the instructions and did what they were supposed to with needing minimal individual help. One worked quite a bit slower than the others, but she finished before class ended, so it was OK.
~My outfit today was pretty sexy depsite no real effort on my part.
~I was lucky enough to find some very soft, very fresh wheat and nut bread at the store last night, so I enjoyed a fantastic pb&j sandwich for lunch today.
~The "Inspector Gadget" movie was on TV at lunch. I hadn't seen it or heard anything good about it, but I <3 Matthew Broderick.
~The sun was shining and it was a beautiful, breezy spring day.
~I picked up the apartment today at lunch. It looks a lot nicer.
~The students often finish the work quickly and are allowed to watch YouTube videos until the end of class. Because I was so effing sick of Mr. Bean and Mario gameplay (the things they love to watch), I exerted my dictatorial power and watched explosions and cat videos in class today. Cat videos in class FTW.
~Someone brought birthday cake to school.
~I realized one good thing about the new job is that I'm taller than all my students.
~I heard a juicy rumor from one of the teachers, who heard from one of the parents, who claims to have heard "from the source" that our director doesn't pay the teachers on time, which is why another teacher, who cannot, in fact, confirm this craziness, is leaving in a few weeks. Can you imagine what they'll think when another teacher puts in her 30 days notice around the same time?
~There are lots of fun things to look forward to this weekend including a trip to the zoo and wearing my new "Parfait Happy Virus" t-shirt.
~I opened my own stuck jars of jelly and spaghetti sauce today.
~I'm currently making spaghetti.

Mayhem in the making

One teacher was sick today, so somebody decided the best plan of action was to combine the two pre-k classes for the greenest teacher there, me. This means I got to teach 17 5-year-olds all at once. Can you imagine? Really, just picture more than a dozen little Korean children in one small space. Yikes.

Actually, it was surprisingly civil. The more advanced class was very patient and helped the other class with some of the assignments. I was supposed to teach them "music" for 40 minutes, but having never taught it before and having no idea what to do, we opted for playroom time instead. What a madhouse; yet there were no fights and the big group was better behaved than each smaller class usually is in the playroom. It was a nice change for the one boy in a class of girls to have 6 other boys to play with and for the 2 girls in a class of boys to have 8 other girls to play with.

I just have one more combined pre-k class period after lunch to manage. I've decided to scrap the lesson (which involves 17 children with scissors) in favor of coloring. Can't wait.

Hashing

I started hashing last week with the Seoul PMS Hash House Harriettes, a women only group, and really enjoyed it. We walked the trail, which was perfect since I haven't run in 4 months (with the weather being so cold) and come from a country (Texas, I mean) that doesn't have crazy hills like Korea.

This week I went with the Yongsan Kimchi H3 group, which had a good walking trail and fun afterparty. They sang a bunch of super bawdy songs, so I shared a few of my Amtgard ones and will have to remember more for next time.




I'm not really feeling the evening bar group, though. Everyone calls me "oh, a baby" because I'm the youngest person in the room by 3 years. That's a little cute the first or second time, less much the fifth and so on. Also, there are a lot of loud personalities and really annoying drunks, which wouldn't be so bad if they'd just leave me be since I fall into neither category. I have more fun watching and listening than being dragged into conversation just because I'm new.

Hash House Harriers are "a drinking club with a running problem" that meets on the weekends, and there are innumerable chapters throughout the world. A few members go ahead to mark a trail with chalk, and everyone else follows later to end at someone's apartment or a bar for drinks.

I'm desperately looking for reasons not to hate Korea, and I think hashing can be a big one. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can comfortably integrate with one or more groups and stick with this. With most of the members being much older than me, they remind me a bit of my Amtgard friends, and I hope I can find a similar connection here.

Seoul PMS HHH
Yongsan Kimchi HHH
The wikipedia run-down

Pillow fight

Can you believe it went on for any hour before being broken up?