Friday, August 24, 2012

Baby booboo butt hurt

True Tales from Web-dating Misadventures

BBBBH: Hello im brad your profile caught.my eye.so what.do..you.enjoy.doing. for..fun.I..own.my own lake love sports.music etc.get back.to.me brad
Moi: I enjoy correcting people's shitty grammar, spelling, and punctuation. Are you a child? How fucking hard is it to type a coherent message?
BBBBH: its not hard shit my bad i did not add ? marks or .s guess you dont want to talk?
Moi: Are you serious?
1. Capitalize and add an apostrophe to "It's."
2. Add a period at the end of a sentence. (After hard, bad, and .s)
3. Capitalize "shit," and put a comma after the interjection.
4. Capitalize the word "I."
5. "?" is a question mark, so when you write "? mark," it reads "question mark mark."
6. Wtf is ".s" supposed to be?
7. The word "don't" is a conjunction, so it requires an apostrophe as well.
BBBBH: your a fat ugly **** so stop messaging me you dumb ho have a nice day
Moi: If that's how you really feel, why did you message me to begin with? Unsolicited messages really only come from those who are interested and attracted. It seems you're just a little boy feeling butt hurt and lashing out over rejection. Good luck with that.
Maybe he's visually impaired?

1 comment:

  1. I love your writing voice. It's so refreshing!

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    ReplyDelete