Monday, November 16, 2009

First day of school

I feel a deep and abiding shame and disgust, revolting repulsion for the sickening, nigh unspeakable horrors inflicted upon my poor, fragile mortal shell this day.

Rape? Kinda. Really I just need a pizza. Stat.

My boss took me to lunch today. He asked what kind of food I wanted, assured me we could get American food, but I said I wanted to try Korean food, how about noodles. So he ordered for me noodles with seafood. There were dead creatures in my dish! Scallops, a prawn, and the pointy half of a crab. But I ate. Only the noodles. I mentally coached myself around the disgusting creatures contaminating my dish and only gagged once. I'm not sure what exactly that says about my character that I can choke down the most disgusting stuff on earth for the sake of being polite, but I feel I need someone to say to me that I'm a bigger man than they.

Also, our server made fun of me for eating the noodles first; supposedly that action makes people fat. Horrified, mortified, whatever, I laughed along with him.

Cheese sandwich, you are my sunshine in this God-forsaken land of fish.

To school:
It's a lucky thing I'm thin-ish because my boss parks so freaking close to other cars. Also, they drive like fucking maniacs over here. There are signs at many intersections that allow for unprotected left turns on red lights. And they only pay heed to any red lights as they see fit. And they turn from whatever damn lane they please and cut others off often. But there is no rage. It's like the Twilight Zone or something.

When we pulled up, I decided I would move to the apartments by the school for sure, an option I've been given for the end of the year. I could open my window there and spit on the school. But later my fellow teachers asked about my current place and said they heard it was expensive. What? I dunno.
I was told I'd be teaching 10- to 12-year-olds. By that, they mean 8 to 14. The first class was the worst. The kids were so much younger than I expected, so adorable and exuberant and LOUD. The academy is set up with 3 Korean teachers and me. Annie was there to help me through the first class, only she had no idea what the foreign teacher's role is supposed to be, so that went poorly.
I spent 2 whole classes playing hangman. And 2 half classes. These kids LOVE hangman. It's nuts. The class the other teachers warned me about having ill-behaved children wasn't that bad.

My last class was 13- and 14-year-old boys who gave me crap for not knowing Korean but phrased it so well in English that I can't help but want to smack the one upside the head. Whatever. They're not so bad.

I tried Kimpa (sp???), rice and stuff wrapped in seaweed. It tasted ok except for the seaweed, but now I'm having gross tasting burps.

My boss gave me a prepaid cell phone. After 3 days of peaceful separation from one, I am loathe to carry this one.

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