Riding on the bus, standing room only, my hands in a death grip on the bar far above my head, I feel silly and smug thinking half the country can't do what I'm doing right now... reaching that bar.
The urge to lift my feet from the ground and monkey around a bit every time the driver slams to a halt at an intersection is hard to resist. But there are enough people in close proximity to kick, so I refrain.
I pick a spot standing next to sleeping ajumma. She startles awake and looks baffled as hell at my presence. Then, probably figuring me for a dream demon, she nods off again. This happens two more times before we reach her stop.
*I* am the whitey who will ever more haunt her dreams. That's one of my unvoiced lifelong goals- to haunt someone's dreams. I just always thought I'd have to be dead and restless to do it. I'd say it's quite an accomplishment. Teacha can has sticka plz?
One of my students today was wearing a Disney knockoff hoodie with the following Engrish (Konglish?):
In your carears you will meet many people. All are signillcant They deserve you allantion and care, oven if all you do is smile and say HELLO.
This really brightened my day.
Here's a fun exercise: count how many things are wrong with this scenario.
Teacher's cash payday is the 16th of every month, and the 16th falls on a Saturday this month. Teacher's contract stipulates she shall wait no longer than 31 days between paychecks, and so she assumes she will be paid on the 15th. At the end of the work day on the 15th, the boss asks for her bank account number so he can transfer payment on the 16th. After admitting to not having a darn clue what the account number is (seriously, why would anyone know that?), he suggests she text message it to him when she gets home, then.
Edit: In attempting to text my boss, I discover I cannot text numerals on my phone (It's only practical use is for beaning a mugger.) and have to write out the numbers in Englishee. Added security for me, huh?